DISPATCHES
A Farewell to Dreams
by Rob Schultheis
Jul 15, 2010 | 1218 views | 16 16 comments | 15 15 recommendations | email to a friend | print
Paris in the 1930s; Manhattan in the late 40s (according to many); Laos in the 50s; Boulder in the 60s; Kathmandu in 72… .

Sometimes a time and place intersect in a way that is so special, so far beyond the boundaries of the prosaic, that the tiniest, most peripheral sliver of the Zeitgeist refracts the magic; a glow so golden that even as it begins to come to a close you realize that you have experienced something you never will again; that you may search the rest of your life, but nothing, nowhere, no-how, will ever approach it. A “music I heard with you was more than music” kind of thing….

Summers in Telluride have something akin to that quality, and this one is no exception. At the same time, from talking with friends, I’ve come to realize that I’m not alone among locals in sensing that something has gone very, very wrong in the world. I seem to hear a voice that whispers, “Enjoy it while you can, because these golden times may be among the last you’ll ever see.”

You don’t have to be St. Germaine, Nostradamus, or the Oracle at Hemis to gaze into the future and see trouble, trouble and more trouble; the signs smack you in the face.

A couple of summers ago, as our nation fought a war to seize still more of the Earth’s oil and gas, monstrous and obscene “recreational vehicles” of unprecedented bulk and grossness began to appear on our roads; as long as your average suburban house is wide, inevitably towing a super-sized SUV, ideally a Humvee, and sometimes a matching trailer packed with even more possessions, they were almost always driven by elderly couples with poison eyes and mean, snapping-turtle mouths, the kind who for no explicable reason speed up when you try to pass them and think that Jesus was a Free Market Social Darwinist with pink skin, brown hair, blue eyes and a button nose. Favorite bumper stickers included “BUSH-CHENEY,” “WE’RE SPENDING OUR GRANDCHILDREN’S INHERITANCE” and, later, “MCCAIN-PALIN.”

How many gallons per mile do these hideous saurians devour? Draw a line straight from these rolling sarcophagi to “Shock and Awe,” and keep on going, to today’s hole in the ocean that’s draining the life out of Life itself, every second, every minute of every day this summer. That thick black lethal ooze that’s killing the sea, that and the mad mindless greed and hatred of all that’s important and true that lies behind it, that won’t stop till it’s killed all of our golden summers to come. Once we had dreamers, shamans and

singers to set us right, to point the way, but now the dreamers are gone, where no one knows, and we’re left in thrall to idiot kings and howling priests. Straight out of an asylum, they run the show, and during their reign there’ll be no magical ages, only fading memories, fast forgotten.
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Gondola
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July 27, 2010
smondola

dont believe the signs you read on the gondola...it aint run 247 on wind power...

and either is them there lifts carrying all dose people who got by flying and driving...

Box Canyon Blog.com
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July 27, 2010
Dear, dear Robbie,

Look, I can take a punch, and I love opposing forces for they create such energy that, if harnessed, could reduce Arabia’s mighty sword to a dull pocket knife. But not when someone punches my true love right in the face. I’m talking about the RV lifestyle, my avocational Achilles heel. And that’s just what a journalism schoolyard bully did last week when he wrote a “column” piece for the Telluride Watch newspaper.

This “article” was handed to me by John Q, a fellow dreamer, newbie RV’er and “Airliner” camper. I read it out loud, and my incredulity became more and more obvious with each passing generalization. Remember how they taught us not to do that in first grade... cause it makes us small? Look, you can Pee on Rush and his cronies or the Lefty Lieberman’s all you want, but don’t you dare Pee on my RV Life... the one I’m trying to get back, that is.

You’ll waste kilotons more fossil fuels, Rob whateveryourlastnameis, driving to your heated, electrical device laden cubicle in Telluride... in your gasoline car... from your natural gas heated apartment or, shame on you, house... which is at least a dozen if not 60 miles from the Watch’s office. Unless, of course, you are one of the many “trust-funders” in Telluride who can afford to populate and pollute quaint overpriced La La land neighborhoods because you’re sucking on the tit of Mommy and Daddy’s hard won wealth, money that affords and entitles them as the “earners” to finally, in the waning years of their wasteful, energy sucking life, go and recreate just a little bit. And you have a selfish, presumptuous ego based snit and try to shame them/us for doing so?

I hope you live in a Yurt, Rob, and that you walked to work and typed your angry tantrum that should have been titled “if-I-can’t-have-an-RV––I don’t-want-anyone-else-to-have-one” on a manual typewriter by candlelight. Because if you have a car, Rob, and you drive it on asphalt roads, and you have a TV and a computer that you don’t bother to unplug every night... you are nothing but a slightly matter-of-degree greener hypocrite than the good people you lambast, much like the Vegan who eats fish or wears leather.

Does your car not have rubber tires and require fuel? Do you not shave? Does your “glass house” not have lights? Does your snobby, arrogant, and so far, insignificant life in Telluride not impact this planet far more than someone who likely sold their massive fossil fuel wasting house and downsized into a 200 square foot RV? Do you know that RV’er’s don’t get behind the wheel every hour of every day and drive, drive, drive? That they only drive as far as they need to wear shorts and play tennis or camp someplace pretty where they can walk and ride their bikes... and that, gee, most RV’er’s actually stay the winter or summer in one area?

And do you know, Generalizing Rob, that they/we are more entitled to use the asphalt road you’re driving on than you are? because they/we, by virtue of our stomach turning “gross” wealth and number of years lived have poured far more tax dollars into the “system”than you likely ever will? Yes, we, Rob, the one’s you call “elderly couples with poison eyes and mean, snapping-turtle mouths, the kind who for no explicable reason speed up when you try to pass (us) and think that Jesus was a Free Market Social Darwinist with pink skin, brown hair, blue eyes and a button nose." and our "Favorite bumper stickers included “BUSH-CHENEY,” “WE’RE SPENDING OUR GRANDCHILDREN’S INHERITANCE” and, later, “MCCAIN-PALIN.”

And one more thing General, you might be surprised to learn that not all Motorhomers and RV’er’s are republican.

Oh Small Rob... thou thinkest thy pen is witty and sharp and thou hast an ego so large in thine own mind. But when thou comest down to earth and learn what we learned in first grade... to not generalize from “appearance” those around you, and to not covet what you haven’t earned a right to own, you might well grow up and be a good lad and big boy, instead of small. And whatever you do, Rob, no matter your wealth, do not ever buy an RV. No, in order to be true to yourself you must sleep in a tent, on the ground, in the rain and sleet and snow, and walk, like Jesus did. Unless, of course, your RV is a horse and wagon.

Now be a good “small” person Rob, and pullest thy foot from thy mouth and ass by printing a retraction to those of us who live in “obscene hideous (RV) saurians” and “seized” all the oil from Iraq (we did? huh.) or I will run you over with my behemoth Humvee.

Check your facts.
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July 27, 2010
Electricity used to operate the gondola comes from wind power purchased from San Miguel Power Association.
Please stop
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July 27, 2010
criticizing us Tellurider's-I cant take it...

I made all the right moves-I went to Smith undergrad, Harvard grad school (in public policy at the JFK Center for Government!)

I did policy work at a think tank..I turned down a real job in a real city to come to TElluride!

I believe in all the Ruling Class imperatives like Immigration Policy!, Whites are Bad!, Tea Party is Racist!, Republicans are Bad and Genetically Deficient!, Global Warming!.

I take yoga!

I cant stand the thought that somehow I am responsible for human waste inasmuch as people who come to Telluride as tourists (and support me over at TNCC or the One Foundation) use oil and gas to get here and ride our electric powered gondola (which causes Global Warming as our electricity comes from Coal!)and this is akin to feeding my family processing uranium.

I cant stand the thought that I am not above it all!

I need to sign off and get a Pilates stretch to calm my mind.

Hold on there
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July 27, 2010
Do you mean to say that using coal fired electricity to run our ski lifts and using oil and gas from the middle east (the wars!) to import the people who sustain our economy is the same type of behavior as people who would process uranium to make energy?

This cant be...we here in Telluride are better than they are...
the problem is
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July 27, 2010
that Rob said what most of us think as we sit in judgment over at the Bean...

But we are coming of age..we are going to do what we think...

Like ban plastic bags for groceries while not even talking about banning them for our unleashed pack of dogs that poop everywhere...

Our dog's-off limits to criticism (Like Carnevale-have you ever seen him carrying a plastic bag for Old Blackie? No! He just carries water for the remnants of the USSR who reside in town and are on council with him.

Like lecturing the rest of the world on the oil wars in Iraq and Afghanistan even though our entire economy is dependent on oil...we eat because oil brings people to our overpriced ski hill...

But lets not let a few facts get in the way of our idealism, Mr. Rob...you may have been a journalist traveling with some Marines but you will never be a Marine and could never see the forest for the trees like they have.
Look buddy...
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July 27, 2010
Around here, we prop up our poor self esteem by being blind to our faults and clear eyed to yours.

We knock down trees, kill animals, erect un-natural metal ski lifts so we can lure you to ski. When you are here we lecture you on your plastic bag usage (we got a plan for you on that) and criticize your politics. We allow you to get mugged in town park because we employ a large marshall's department, most of whom are as useless as tit's on a bull, to pass out parking tickets from 9-5 during the bright sunny day. And dont go ragging on our Valley Floor- this is paid for by you and the old people who come to Telluride in their RV's towing their humvees-the kicker on this is that we (and Rob is one of them) use your tax dollars to pay for the Valley Floor and then we plow down the snow for our cross country ski club set...

Now look, most of us here have never accomplished anything, some of us came here as ski bums and hopped on the real estate wave and became Realtors...now that wave is gone we are just what we were originally, ski bums. Most of the rest of us are trust funders-never worked a day in our life. The working class here comes from Montrose and Ridgway and other little places-let me take this moment to implore you to consider your oil and gas usage as you peasants come to work to serve us. Consider walking next time...

Yep, we here in Telluride are the Best! Why in our county we preach "do as I say and not as I do" especially when it comes to the peasants over in the West end of our county...we are all up in arms about their plan to make a few jobs for themselves and we are sure to put the brakes on that-those people will have to feed their family some other way than in a manner to disturb our sensibilities.

Speaking of sensibilities-if you are looking for work we are needing a prairie dog relocation specialist-we got ourselves a prairie dog infestation complete with fleas, the plague, etc and these little endangered species have just expanded too much in our beloved Valley Floor Wild and Free Forever ..so our Mayor and our council has decided to relocate the little buggers back to their little place (instead of reality based animal management) and we "hope they stay there".

Ok, off to the Steaming Bean for the first of my six cups of Organic Child Free Union Produced cup of coffee in my recycled plastic bpa free coffee cup to read my New York Times, play checkers and chess with my fellow unemployed trust funders, and figure out just who else we need to tell how to live.

Cheers!
Mark Johnson
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July 27, 2010
Telluride Watch Editor,

I seldom write to Editors, but after reading Angry Rob's (A Farewell To Dreams, by Rob Schultheis) venomous Editorial piece where he blames the state of America and the world, seemingly, on Motor homes, Humvees, and the "elderly" who own and drive them, it was either respond or bite my tongue in two.

My first response was to show the article to my blog audience at, www.BoxCanyonBlog.com and offer my thoughts. Their comments and emails continue to roll in as I write this... I've include some below. I copy/pasted it below and doubt you will print it as it's nearly as long as the article, but at least pass it along to mr. Rob.

I don't know for sure whether Rob lives in Telluride or not but he's a perfect fit for your town. Having commuted to and from Ridgway for five years to work, I am familiar with local politics and the somewhat extreme Left viewpoints of the two newspapers and citizens in general. You are fortunate that Telluride is so beautiful that tourists return year in and year out in spite of your arrogant in-your-face politics and the look you give down your long noses at ordinary conservative minded people who worked hard for their money and spend it in your town. At first I thought your editor simpleminded... to bite the hands that feed him/her. Newspapers like the Watch go out of business every day for editorials such as Rob's that attack people's lifestyles and age. I guess Rob will never get old; his anger will surly kill him before his hair is grey like the RV driver's he rips to shreds for choosing to live, and or, travel in Motorhomes.

It is the "elderly couple" owners "with poison eyes and mean, snapping-turtle mouths" who drive those "monstrous and obscene 'recreational vehicles' of unprecedented bulk and grossness..." that buys your ridiculously overpriced land... who builds Mac Mansions and employs the readers of your righteous rag... which in turn pays your salary and brings enormous tax revenues to your town... so you can squander it to the tune of almost 100 million dollars (bottom line) to buy up a few acres of mosquito infested valley floor swamp land. If it were not for the above folks that spend their hard earned money on land, homes and trinkets, your newspaper would implode for lack of advertising. It is an absurd and condescending culture you propagate over there in La La Land. I hope Rob's piece slipped by you... that you didn't read it and nod your head in agreement and say "this is great stuff." But if you were stupid enough to bloody the hands that feed you, you deserve to be treated the same way Rob treated one of the largest and wealthiest demographics (seniors)... the ones who prop up your rag of a newspaper so you can have a job to go to and feed your families and maybe even go camping someday, in an RV.

Mark Johnson

Ouray, Colorado
Right on, Rob.
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July 26, 2010
A few years back I and a carfull of Brownie Girl Scouts were nearly in a head on collision because the R.V. we were legally passing sped up from 35 to 55 apparently just out of spite. When we did manage to pass, we got a glimpse of an angry, white-knuckled old guy and his equally angry, or perhaps terrified, wife. It's hard not to be biased after an experience like that.
Lorane42
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July 25, 2010
Rob, What a rude article (7/15). I have no idea how old you are, but believe me, if lucky, you may well be a senior one of these days. What a generalization! I'm not sure if we are considered a senior citizen, but we own a mid-size class A motor home and tow a Jeep, when we have the opportunity to do some RVing. It is a special way of life. Sure, we have back-packed, tented, owned a pickup camper, and a Class C motor home. I don't think we have ever given anyone an evil (poison) eye and we certainly don't hold up traffic! Do we use our country's precious resources, yes, but only moderately. I'm guessing that many full time RVers consume less resources than those living in stick built houses.
Go Rob
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July 25, 2010
Good description of the unconscious and their mad "drive" toward turning the world as we know it into a very hot place. (Anyone heard of death by fire?).
Brother in Arms-
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July 24, 2010
Rob-take a breath, buddy.

This whole march on Republicans is really of a flavor that only Carnevale can come up with...

Can't you see the trees for the forest?

It ain't Republicans vs Democrats- as if one were the answer and the other the poison...

In 2010, we, the people, are subject to a ruling class made up of both Republicans and Democrats that in truth are extremely similar in drive and what they want to accomplish-one through the accumulation of the machines of production and the other through centralized power. Net, it is about power.

Absolute power corrupts..

The call isnt against the one party or the other-our blindness is caused by own hand, we need to loose the tether that binds us to them...

The problem is us and how we live...we need to change that..

Whoah! We need to change right here right now in Telluride-pedestrianize, get off the oil, ..act locally ..

Quit writing tripe, you are better than that.

So....
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July 24, 2010
So, you're saying the cup is half empty then? Nice perspective, good description of the RV driver, although I haven't seen their eyes because I always see them wearing the huge virtual reality sunglass devices that really freak me out although I do own a pair and on occasion wear them but not in public. Very powerful piece and probably all true. Seen the snapping turtle mouths.

Glad you brought up RVs though. Since the world seems to be ending soon I'd like to do some stuff. If I could afford it, I'd get a huge RV and hire sherpa to drive a support fleet of similar but slightly smaller RVs to carry the rest of my stuff and my support personnel. I would have Hummers stationed at all major cities across the nation and when passing through Vegas I'd take a Hummer to get yet another hummer if you get my drift. Then I'd get bored and hire more sherpa to just drive everything around while I attend Lillith Fair to pick up on some sensitive earthy babes. They'd go nuts over the canvas shopping bags I'd have in the RV. I'd swap the Hummer on the back for a Prius. Priuses pull the hairiest granola chicks I've ever seen. The kind that smell like incense and always seem like they're meditating.

Anyway.

Bud, take a pill or
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July 23, 2010
something...

Do you have any idea how many trees your newspaper kills each week to publish your tripe?

Dear freaking Krist almighty.

Enough already, first the bags, then you.

I am off to get a bottle of Fiji Water and then chase it with some Evian
WandrinLloyd
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July 23, 2010
You've got to be kidding.... How many of those RVs have you seen in Telluride -- compared to the number of Hummers, SUV's and their ilk (many driven by the people you describe in those RVs). Perhaps a little research would have put more validity to your words. How many of those RVs are there versus the total number of all the other vehicles that consume those fuels -- from cars, trucks of all sizes, trains, airplanes. Their consumption is a nit compared to all the other usages. And don't forget how products are manufactured; how your home is heated, how you cook your food....

All of us in RVs aren't Republican and some don't have grandchildren. I am one of those.
random
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July 15, 2010
thx, rob.